Through the crowd I sway and float,
On a cloud I stand straight without flaw.
Hearing coo’s of appreciation and pleasant chirps,
Everyone looks at me in awe.
They tell me I’m perfection,
That I could do no wrong or fall,
However, they forget I am human,
They forget they don’t know me at all.
I look about the faces around me,
Their eyes only search for what they don’t possess,
They don’t see me for who I am,
They see me for the things I have, over which they can obsess.
Do they not know I am more?
More than a mask or a shell that pleasantly shines?
Do they know they consist of greater things as well?
Can they only perceive what is on the outside?
It slips my mind that I swim this alluring current too,
Of desiring something I am not;
Denying what I am and what is inside,
Telling my heart what it can’t feel and what it ought.
Until I unzip the costumes of those around me and my own,
I know nothing, but what my eyes see.
And nothing is exactly what external sight can absorb,
For a hollow shell can have no deeper meaning.
You may not know my soul,
Alas, yours I know no better,
Until I consent to unzip my skin,
And forget the insignificant things that keep us fettered.
So, here is my soul; shadow and all,
I remove my external mask,
I challenge you the same,
And for you, to those around you, please ask.
Because all we see now is repulsion or beauty,
Or somewhere in between,
But, my dear, this is nothing at all,
Because trust me, you aren’t truly seeing.
So shed your skin and embrace who you are,
And peer deeper into others souls,
Remember we are more than empty shells,
And we need nothing else to make us whole.
Have you ever felt like you aren’t really being seen? Like you have some type of invisible cloak on that shows the outside world one persona, but hides who you truly are? I know I have, and I also know that it frustrating because you don’t know how the heck you can get the damn cloak off!! (excuse my language)
Humans have a tendency to seek for what they don’t have in those around them. Whether that be bigger boobs, fuller lips, a flat tummy, a flawless complexion, more muscles, a better singing voice, a cooler vibe, etc., we desire what we don’t have. When we find it in someone we obsess about why we can’t be more like them. Why do we do this? Because we are searching for safety; safety from failure, ridicule, embarrassment, or ostracism. We tell ourselves that if we are different in some way we will finally be safe.
Although we might believe we are trying to get out from under the crushing judgements and opinions of our fellow humans, we are actually running from our inner critic. That aggravating, and in truth harmful, voice that tells us nasty things. It constantly whispers in our ear that we aren’t enough, we don’t belong, and that we need to change who we are in order to be enough and to belong. Well, why would we listen to this bully? If we are searching for safety and happiness, why would we take advice from a voice that knows squat about happiness and makes us feel like crud? Why can’t we reply back with, “screw you” and move on with our lives? Because, we are afraid what it is saying is right.
What if we aren’t good enough? What if we are weird and don’t fit in? What if everyone is looking at us and internally says, “boy, I am glad I’m not them.”? What if we are unlovable? The “what if’s” extend into an unceasing list. The snowball effect takes over, and we end up watching our every step to make sure we are doing it perfectly to avoid these excruciating thoughts. We become so engrossed in ensuring our safety that we actually become more vulnerable to the fatalist of them all; ourselves.
Only we have the power to choose to spend our whole lives trying to complete ourselves or to let ourselves be complete. Your inner critic tells you it knows how to make you whole, how to make you “perfect.” However, our inner critic tears us apart. Our inner critic keeps us blind from our own perfect imperfection. Each and every being on this earth was born unique, each with the purpose of teaching others what they cannot learn from themselves and to learn from others what they cannot master from within. It is our birthright to be. It is our destiny to be. By changing ourselves and denying who we are by hiding behind a mask is denying our right to teach, learn, and truly live. Plus, we are depriving those around us of what we have to give.
Would we try to change a butterfly into a fish? A dog into a bird? A horse into a centipede? of course not! Each and every one of these animals has a purpose on this earth and so do you. So, why do others pick on me, or criticize me even if I don’t want to change, you ask? Because they have some of the loudest inner critics of all. They feel they are trapped because they have tried, and in most cases succeeded, to change themselves so much, the only other option they have is turning into a goat…which they can’t really achieve! If they can change you, they feel they have control, and thus “please” their inner critic. However, this inner voice can never be pleased. Have you ever completely satisfied your inner critic? I certainty haven’t! The truth is, the inner critic isn’t looking to be pleased, as I have said prior, it is looking for safety.
When we try to appease others, we are really attempting to assuage the critic or ego inside of us. If we feel we do, we get the sense we are safe or “in the clear.” For the meantime, anyhow. However, this is false. We are never sheltered from the critic inside, in fact, we are constantly abused by it! The only real safety we can attain is from being completely authentic. By ignoring the egoic voice that constantly chatters in our head, we in theory stop hitting ourselves. When we take off that stupid invisible cloak we begin to see that we are safest just being ourselves. Now, I am not talking physical safety, however, when the inner critic turns into an eating disorder or self-harm, then this applies. I talking about emotional and spiritual safety. When we allow ourselves to be whole and to be human, we begin to see just how incredible we are. This is when we begin to show others they are born to be who they are as well. You possess a gift of wisdom that no other soul has. This gift was something you were born with and what you are destined to give others. Everyone’s gift is different, but you never know how you are special until you let yourself be special.
So, I invite you to be unique and share your gift with the world. In doing so, you will help others remove their masks and shine too. Remember, that you were born complete and you don’t need that dumb cloak. Only you can take it off. Show the world who you really are, and love who you were born to be.
Love and blessings,